Find a fresh start
Hello my dear listeners? Welcome back to yet another episode of Morning cup of Sunshine. We are almost to the end of the year. Here in the USA, the holiday season is about to begin in the next few weeks. Some of you must be thinking how the year went by, how the goals, new year resolutions you planned went for a toss in a couple of months into the year. Some of you might be beaming with glory of accomplishments but some of you are planning to restart what's left out. Some of you might not even be thinking of any goals at this point, because what’s the point? Better start in the next year? Right? No, you can have a fresh start any day. Everyday is a new beginning. Don’t wait for a new week, new month or new year to start fresh. You can restart your journey with a fresh mindset anytime and that is what I am going to tell you how, in this episode. So, are you ready? Frankly, I needed to hear this topic for myself. So, I thought I better start researching myself. This episode is full of practical tips because that’s what I would have wanted to hear from someone if I was looking for a fresh start.. Alright, without any further adieu, let’s begin talking about today’s topic. Shall we?
I know it hurts right now, not knowing what’s coming, not knowing what your future holds. I know that there is a pain because the new, unknown is scary. But you just have to take the first step, don’t even look at the entire staircase, just hold onto the first step and take that one step towards a fresh start. Think of the end as a beginning to something fresh, something new, a means to start over, start fresh. I know it feels scary because of your past experience. You were on this path before but got sidetracked and now it takes a huge amount of courage and willpower to even think about a fresh start. But trust me my friend, it is not as difficult as it sounds. It is never too difficult or too late to become who you want to be. No matter how difficult the past is, you can always start fresh. Initially, I was thinking I will give you the exact steps but you know what I am in the mood of letting my thoughts flow freely. I am really passionate about this topic because I have experienced this many times.
As a kid, I had to change my schools almost every year. Every year, I felt a huge burden to find new friends, to be accommodated in a new school but I think it made me more adaptable to any situation. My mom and dad were my cheerleaders. They helped me get over my fear. They helped me gain confidence. They encouraged me to be myself and take the challenges head on.
When my mom passed away, my sister and I were in agonizing pain. We felt nothing can help us come out of this sadness. We were totally broken. But my dad became our pillar of strength and he showed us how to start fresh. Of course we still missed her but we were able to find at least some normalcy in our lives. He showed us that there is more to life than what we were seeing at that point. We slowly found our fresh start, we three became one unit, one close knit unit. We started to be there for each other like never before. This fresh start was the hardest start ever. But we survived, or I would say, we thrived. We were inspired to make mom proud. This helped us find a fresh start in life.
Later when I came to the US with my husband and 7 month old kid, I had to start over. I knew nobody here. I had no friends, no family. I immediately started feeling homesick and felt that I will never ever like this place. I never imagined in my wildest dream that I will nourish friendships here, I will find my purpose here, I will have friends who I can call family. I still remember the first few days after coming to the US, the only thought that used to come to my mind was how can we go back? I was so skeptical of even giving it a chance. I was not ready for a fresh start. But I gave myself some time to adjust. I started exploring. I started creating a new routine. I did not know how to drive a car very well but back in India, I had my beloved two wheeler. I was so used to taking my two wheeler out and getting anywhere I wanted that being stuck at home and waiting for Rushi to come home to get the simple things like grocery was extremely tough for me. I started learning to drive. That made a huge difference. After learning to drive, my accessibility increased, I was able to get around easily. I started feeling much more independent.
Essentially what I am trying to say by telling you these three prominent situations in my life, is that at every stage I found some strong motives that helped me find a fresh start. Can you tell what those were? When I was a kid and changing schools almost every year, communication with my parents, sharing my worries, and my fears with them gave me the courage to start fresh. After my mom passed away, the strong motivation to make her proud by my actions helped me find my fresh start. Finally, when we came to the US, giving myself time to adjust and finding independence helped me get over my fear of this new beginning and gave me a fresh start.
When you keep dreaming about a perfect life, you may not find a fresh start. You will be stuck in the idea of a perfect life, rather bend a little, mend a little. Find what you have, where you are. Adapt, improvise and move on. Take some time for self reflection. What are some things in your existing life, routine that bring you joy? What are some things that you don’t enjoy? What brings you a sense of accomplishment? What brings you a sense of joy? What are some of your non-negotiable principles in life? Ask a lot of questions to yourself. Knowing yourself is the key to finding a fresh start. If you are listening to me for a while, you know what I am going to suggest here. Bring out that pen and paper and start penning down your thoughts, aka journal. Write your dreams, your vision. What is your idea of a fresh start? Why do you want a fresh start? What went wrong before? What is your goal? Having a clear goal always helps. Do you want to make it as a writer? But you have not written a single page in a long time, call it writer’s block. Then set a clear goal to write at least for 15 minutes every single day. Plan your daily schedule in such a way that you can write for at least 15 minutes. Let me take another example, let’s say you want to make a career change. But you are too comfortable in your current position. You are scared to step into the new world and look for a fresh start. But in your heart you know that it will make you happy. What should you do? First of all, accept that it is okay to be scared. Realize that this is what you truly desire, career switch. Leaving your comfort zone is not easy. But it is not impossible. What do you need to make a career switch? Do you need to learn new skills? Do you need to brush up your existing skills? Have a clear idea of your goal in your mind. Once you know what you have to achieve then it is fairly simple. Start taking small steps, baby steps. Remember ? Day by day, step by step. Spend some time every single day working towards your goal. Learn that new skill, brush up your existing skills. Work on your resume. Take one actionable step every single day. You will be surprised how quick you come out of your comfort zone if you are prepared and if you show courage.
But do you know what are the biggest roadblocks in the journey of a fresh start? Our own limiting beliefs and too much attention to what others will think? Am I right? Has this thought ever crossed your mind? I am 35, I have a full time job, But I really want to start a studio to teach classical dance, because that’s my passion. How can I start something at this age? How can I even think about it? It is not at all possible. Change the age, passion or situation. But we all have dreams and at one point we want to work on it. But we hold back those dreams because of our limiting beliefs. I wanted to start a podcast but I am no celebrity or I am not someone with a huge social media following. I put off starting a podcast for months because I thought nobody was going to listen to my podcast. Nobody will even care about it. But my desire to write and have something of my own was so strong that I was able to overcome that limiting belief. I still don’t have a huge following or millions of downloads per episode. But I found out that writing, recording, reading the comments of my very dear and loyal listeners and most importantly bringing the useful content to you brings me more joy than the number of downloads. My limiting belief was just holding me back from taking a leap of faith towards a fresh start. I was navigating through my life without any real passion for too long to even realize what I was missing. But once I realized it, a small limiting belief was not going to stop me. I know, everyone has these limiting beliefs. Let’s say you are really crafty and you want to start a small business but you think it is too difficult to start anything from the ground up. Or let’s say your cooking skills are exceptional and you have been thinking about catering business or a You tube channel to showcase your cooking skills but your limiting belief is holding you back. Let me tell you my friend, there is a beautiful world out there once you just break that barrier of limiting belief and that world is waiting for you with open arms, you just have to take a leap of faith. I know what is holding you back, what will others think? Right? Yes, people are going to talk. Let me be very open here. I know it sounds a little harsh but people are always going to have opinions, no matter what. If you don’t do anything, they will say you are so good at cooking but you are wasting your skills. If you start your You Tube channel and start showcasing your recipes, they will say, now everyone is starting You tube, nothing new, or it should have better filming or editing skills. But tell me my friend, is showcasing your recipes brings you joy? Does your joy depend on what others say? I know, we all want appreciation and validation. But that should not be the sole reason to start anything new. If starting something new, something fresh brings you joy, if that process brings you joy, if the outcome that you see brings you joy then you don’t need validation from someone else. Sometimes, you just know that it is time to start something new and you just trust the magic of a new beginning, magic of a fresh start. You just have to keep your eyes on the prize. Trust the process, keep looking forward to the joy that it is going to bring. Leave the fear of judgements at the bay and focus all your energy towards that fresh start. I understand that change can be scary, but do you know what is scarier? Allowing your fear to stop yourself from growing, evolving and progressing. You are never too old to set a new goal, dream a new dream. Trust yourself my friend, every moment brings you a fresh start. You’ve got a new story to write and trust me it looks nothing like your past, so be brave, be yourself and rewrite your story. It is you who has to tell your own story, it is you who has to write your story. Just remember one thing, you can start fresh any time, even today !!